Nothing to Prove

Sep 11, 2013Approval, Fear, Humility, Persistence

When it comes to motivating others in our Juice Plus+ business, fear is without question one of the biggest hurdles for all of us to overcome. The fear of rejection. The fear of losing face, feeling humiliated, inadequate or incompetent. The fear of disapproval. Of course, the fear of failure. I’ve learned that some of us have a fear of success, so that we find ways to sabotage ourselves right at the threshold of achieving our dreams. Very strange, but I think it’s true.

I’ve offered folks on my Juice Plus+ team a thousand antidotes to their fears—selling techniques, time-management tools, meditation and relaxation methods, goal-setting strategies, even prayers. We all probably have a couple of books sitting next to our beds that tell us exactly how to face our fears.

So, I get it. I completely agree: Fear is at the core of our lives. Not just some of us, but all of us. It just varies in its intensity from person to person, from situation to situation. Fear comes in all shapes, sizes and colors. But we all have them. And, we all find ways to deal with them.

And, on top of that, they don’t ever really go away. Sometimes our fears are throwing us around like a gorilla playing with a rag doll. We’re powerless and paralyzed. Nothing helps. Life is over. Darkness covers us. We might as well quit.

Most days, however, our fears seem more manageable and can be found crouching quietly over in the corner or down in the basement, out of sight. But we know they haven’t withdrawn for good, especially when things get quiet and life’s crazy pace slows a bit.

Thankfully, we know that we can turn up the volume or speed up the activities to numb out those pesky, nagging fears. Our smart phones, all kinds of technology, cable TV and food are most effective at medicating our fears. They’ve rarely let me down.

Let’s not forget the fear of death. We’ve all heard that there are only two things we cannot avoid—death and taxes. Some people, we now know, find a way around the burden of taxes. But when it comes to death—there are no loopholes or exemptions for any of us.

Fear is here to stay. So, I’ve stopped asking folks, “If you had no fear, what would you try to accomplish?” That’s one of the many “mind games” that I relinquished after several decades in the business of motivating people.

What has been helpful for me, however, is the lifelong work of maintaining a healthy perspective. To see things as they really are.

The Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous teaches people how to see life from a different perspective—that deep and lasting recovery will come to those men and women who are humble and honest. People who know and accept their limitations. People who are willing to admit their weaknesses, their failings and their fears to God and to at least one other person.

Men and women who experience recovery from their addictions and freedom from their fears are quick to acknowledge that we are here on this earth for a very short time—and then we are gone.

Remembering that keeps us humble and honest. Remembering that restores a balanced, healthy perspective. Remembering that loosens the grip of fear on our lives.

The brevity of our lives and the certainty of our deaths are the foundation for genuine humility and naked honesty—the best antidotes to fear.

Without humility and honesty, we are stuck with a need to always be right. We are compulsively battling our fear of losing face. We are sucked into the mind-numbing habit of comparing ourselves to others. And we remain emotionally exhausted finding people or groups to be against.

When we are humble and honest people, we will know that ultimately there is nothing to prove.

We will humbly and honestly face our fears, live our lives and pursue our dreams.